It has been 17 years since I last saw my ex and father of my daughter, I remember it like it was yesterday. He came to my apartment and sat with us for a couple of hours. He promised me he would come back for us and that this change was only temporary until he could fix his scholarship. He held his daughter for the last time, finally walking down to his ugly little red Tercel with no hubcaps. I watched with tears in my eyes as he left, not knowing it would be the last time I would ever see him. If I had know that I would have held him a little tighter, told him how much I loved him and kissed him a little longer. The next day I was at work when I got his call as he drove to the airport telling me how much he would miss us, what a lie that turned out to be.
We kept in touch for 2 years, he called me and I spoke to his mom, he would always promise me he was working on coming back but it never happened. When I meet him again the first question will be “Why?” Why could’t you make me hate you, tell me it was over and that we will never see each other. Instead it dragged on until I decided enough was enough. Although my mind put your memories away my heart would not release you until today I think of you.
I spoke to your father in November in which he told me again to do the DNA test and that he didn’t know where you were, maybe London but he has no real interest in the conversation. I don’t have a lot of hope that my daughter will win her case and be recognized as a Qatari due to their laws, as I have been told over and over to just give up because she won’t win. However I believe that Qatar today is ruled by an honest upright Emir who will give us a chance.
I heard that he works in a telecom company by a chance meeting with someone who has moved on but every piece of information I get I Google it and today I decided to Google his name and lo and behold there it was, a picture of you from 2016 accepting an award. My, my how you’ve changed, you are no longer that 22 year old student with messy hair. Now you are a frumpy old guy in a suit who looks older beyond his years, perhaps the look of unhappiness is knowing you left your child behind? I’ve also heard that you own a house and throw parties, not exactly the man I thought you would turn out to be.
We are both in our 40’s, isn’t it time to man up and talk to your child? I don’t want anything from you but a simple answer to my question, “why?”. Why did you leave us?
I will not leave you in peace, I will stalk you until the end of the earth just to ask you why you left us behind. It’s coming soon!